The proper way to describe partner expectations
We scanned partner expectations in two leading matrimony sites and realized that the format in which information is gathered from members of these sites are similar. Instead of focusing on the qualities of a good life partner, the focus was on making sure they eliminate everyone who will not meet expectations. Here is a screen shot of “About my partner expectations” section for your reference.
Instead of focusing on the qualities of a good life partner, the focus was on making sure they eliminate everyone who will not meet expectations. Here is a screen shot of “About my partner expectations” section for your reference.
While all the parameters listed above are important, they really don’t define the personality of the man or their personal goals or attitude towards married life.
So what’s the outcome of such skewed partner expectations? You will end up shortlisting a bunch of men through matrimony sites and end up wasting your time meeting them.
Why is that?
Only when you meet “prospective matches” you will discover that their lifestyle and priorities in life are completely misaligned or unpleasant facts will surface leaving you frustrated!
Read about the three sins of writing partner description for marriage! Click here to read more.
7 Partner expectation samples written the right way!
We have created seven partner expectations samples for women to help visualize the ideal man that look forward to marrying. We made realistic assumptions and you will certainly find sample partner preferences you can use as it is or get inspiration to create your awesome biodata for marriage.
1. Software engineer looking for a working professional
I am looking for a tall, handsome, Sikh professional based out of Mumbai. He should have a fulfilling career and should be able to support my career as a software engineer.
I travel occasionally and I am hoping to find someone who will be available to spend time with me. I am a social drinker and I am OK with marrying a social drinker. However, smoking is a strict no-no.
I don’t intend to stay with the in-laws and prefer an independent life. I have a modern outlook towards life but I believe in traditional values such as respect for parents and helping others in need. I am willing to change my opinions if you can convince me and you should be open-minded about your opinions as well.
2. Musician looking for a man with an artistic background
I am looking for a man who appreciates art and preferably has a keen interest in any art form. Anyone above 5′ 5″ in height with a pleasing personality and cheerful outlook towards life will certainly meet my expectations. Caste / sub-sect and horoscope match are important for me and my family.
I belong to a family of musicians and my future husband should not stand out like a sore thumb! A keen appreciation and understanding of the pulls and pressures in the life of a professional musician are required. I end up traveling a lot during November, December, and January of every year to perform at various classical music festivals across South India and hence the person I am marrying should be willing to support me in my musical endeavors.
3. Divorced woman who is looking to remarry
I am a divorced woman with no kids looking to take the plunge the second time! I had a brief marriage that lasted 10-months and broke up because we were completely incompatible.
Religion or caste does not matter to me. However, I am looking for someone who respects women, not too egotistical, and an ability to empathize with others. Having a great sense of humor and not taking yourself too seriously will be a definite plus.
I expect the person I marry to be a non-smoker. Social drinking is acceptable. Career oriented yet having a sense of responsibility towards family are traits that I appreciate a lot in the person I plan to marry.
4. Hearing-impaired woman looking to get married
I am a hearing-impaired woman and looking for a life partner who understands my disability but does not discriminate based on my impairment. I can speak orally and can hear well with the help of hearing aids and hence my future husband need not learn sign language.
My disability has not come in the way of my zest for life and my passion for travel. Hence, someone who likes visiting new places will be a bonus.
I expect my partner’s family to accept me the way, I am. I am also open to marrying a hearing-impaired person or any other disability.Although my family has been of great support in helping me grow up into a confident person, I believe in leading an independent life. Someone who can look at disability as a matter of fact and not treat it as a curse will be a good match.
I like to keep myself physically fit and hit the gym regularly. If you believe working out, leading a healthy lifestyle, and embracing a positive outlook towards life, we can certainly talk further!
Looking for family description samples for your marriage biodata? Here are 7 examples to get you started. Click here to read them.
5. An independent woman who loves to travel
I am looking for a smart, tall, well-off working professional who is based in Bangalore. I am a Hindu and don’t believe in caste and I am looking for to marry someone from the same religion who is a vegetarian, non-smoker and teetotaller.
I am looking for a man with a pleasing personality that can keep up with my impromptu getaways. You should be willing to also put up with my dog and be open to adopting more of the four-legged kind once we settle down.
I am close to my parents, but they lead an independent life. I am a people’s person and expect my future husband to also embrace my family and friends as his own.
If you are a Nobel Prize winner, please don’t respond. You probably spend all your time chasing after your passion. Believe in work-life balance? I do too! If you have nodded your head in agreement all along, do send me a message.
6. Young working woman in the US looking to settle down in the US
Looking for someone who is at least 5’8″, English / Hindi speaking, Hindu Indian working in the San Francisco Bay Area and is also a citizen / permanent resident. Caste is not an issue.
Having grown up in the US since I was 2 years old, I seldom speak my mother tongue and speak English with an American accent. However, I am still an Indian by heart and expect my partner to appreciate Indian traditions and culture. I am not very outgoing by nature but do have a handful of great friends.
I love to eat and watch a lot of cooking shows on television and hence looking for someone who shares my passion for food. I do not expect my partner to be a master chef, but it would be great if he understands the basic fundamentals of cooking. I am a vegetarian (not a vegan, btw) and would prefer a vegetarian for a partner, to make things simpler.
7. An MBBS student looking to marry a professional
I am looking for a tall, handsome professional, preferably a Doctor, based out of Chennai. I am in my final year MBBS and intend to pursue my specialization in Oncology. I am a Christian and looking to marry a Christian of any sect. I am god fearing, but consider religion to be a very personal choice.
My career is important and I expect to marry someone who will support my passion for being a medical professional. I grew up in a joint family and open to moving into a joint family (if required) is not an issue for me. When I am not studying, I am a member of the local choir. Someone who has a zest for life and a multi-dimensional personality will be preferred. Smoking and drinking is not OK.
Check out these informative posts
Create your Jodi Logik biodata now.
You will need it to find your soulmate!
SIGN UP FOR FREE! LEARN MORE
Posted in Arranged Marriage, Matchmaking, Matrimony Sites
Tagged with: Matchmaking, Matrimony Sites, Partner expectations
Choosing from the thousands of matrimonial sites in India is a headache!
According to the book, Marrying in South Asia: Shifting Concepts, Changing Practices in a Globalising World, there are over 1500 matrimony sites in India. Our ‘unscientific guesstimate’ is that there are over 2000 matrimonial sites in India. In addition, modern matchmaking providers that provide managed dating services are also proliferating in urban India.
If you are someone looking to go through an arranged marriage, you have a problem of plenty when it comes to choosing from the thousands of online matrimonial sites in India. It is quite challenging for anyone to choose one site over the other. Here are four reasons.
1. Low entry barrier for launching matrimonial sites in India
The reason for a large number of sites is the fact that the entry barrier for launching matrimonial sites in India is very low. Create a simple registration form, provide a time-tested profile development feature and throw in a search feature. That’s it. Everybody and their mother think they can attract a large number of customers by just launching a site. Traditional marriage brokers have also jumped into the business of launching matrimony sites as they also have a large number of matrimony profiles in their database.
2. Community-based matrimonial sites in India
The early entrants in the online matrimony market have branched out to offer community-based matrimonial sites in India. For example, tamilmatrimony.com and telegumatrimony.com belong the same company. The dilemma for the user then becomes should they choose to signup with community-based or religion-based matrimonial sites in India or register with more broad-based portals?
3. Matrimonial sites in India are mostly clones
Barring a handful of sites, most matrimonial sites in India look alike and the feature / functionality list is also the same. The only difference you will see if the size and the quality of the profile database. However, you will never know the size or the quality fo the profile database before you enroll and actually use the website. Without independent verification, there is no way for us to trust the profile numbers that matrimony sites in India project to attract new customers.
4. Dubious claims about the size of the profile database
Often, matrimonial sites in India claim to have a large pool of profiles. However, not all of them disclose the fact that the number of active profiles is only a small percentage of the total profiles. Also, the classification of what an active profile is subject to debate and discussion. Let’s say, a site claims they have 2 million active profiles, but the definition of active profile is any activity on the site within the last 6 months. We will never know how many of the 2 million profiles logged off 5 months ago, never to return?
A review of top 5 matrimonial sites in India
In order to help you navigate the maze of matrimonial sites in India, we have compiled a list of five sites along with basic information about these sites, pricing information (if they have publicly disclosed it), user reviews in public forums and Alexa traffic rating to give you a sense of how popular these sites are. Remember, the smaller the Alexa ranking, the more traffic the site has.
Shaadi is one of the oldest matrimony sites in India. According to their website, they have over 35 million users and 4 million people found their matches. Let’s just assume that they have a large user base and you have a fairly good chance fo bumping into someone that might be suitable for further conversation.
They don’t disclose pricing information until you register with them. Free registration will give you access to their database but is pretty much a hook to reel new customers in. If you need to communicate with prospective matches, you will need a paid subscription. Here are the various membership plans offered by Shaadi. We found that the membership plans typically ranges from Rs.2000 to Rs 5000 for a 3-month period. The more you pay, the more number of messages you can send to prospective matches.
Shaadi.com is ranked 108 by Alexa in terms of popularity in India.
User Reviews for Shaadi
This is a review published in New York Times!
Sudha, 28, from Goa, India, suggests that you wait to give a man you meet online your phone number because “most users are not reliable and serious.” She has been using Shaadi.com to look for a man who is ambitious, educated and fun-loving. Sudha was disappointed when some of the men she met in person were not the way they presented themselves in their online photos and messages. Remember: ask for a few recent photos of your match without hats or sunglasses.
This is a review from Mouthshut.com
The app was very useful while searching a partner for my brother. Very user-friendly and easy to use and highly recommended others. The initial launch was tedious and I used to refer to their website however the new app version seems to be good.found better matches as compared to other matrimonial sites. Was also looking in our community, but no luck.
Jeevansathi is gets mentioned as one of the platforms of choice among matrimonial sites in India. They have a large database of verified profiles. Consistently users that we have interviewed rate Jeevansathi poor when it comes to the user interface. However, people also say that the members are more serious in their intent!
Jeevansaathi membership plan ranges between Rs 650 to Rs.1110 per month. Here are the details.
Jeevansaathi is ranked at 316 among all websites in India.
User reviews for Jeevansathi
Review from Mouthshut.com
There are a lot of complaints about the paid membership features and services. Here is one complaint about the fact that the paid membership service inexplicably changed the user’s requirements that resulted in a whole bunch of profiles being sent her way that did not meet her search criteria.
To my surprise, they relaxed our criteria out of our imagination which is totally unacceptable and started sending mail alerts one in a day on a random basis. We again contacted on the above contact number but this time, nobody was picking up the phone for continuous one week and when we tried to contact them on their mail ids then demanded of money refund then nobody took pains to listen to us and left unattended. We were losing our time in following up with them on our grievance rather than focusing on groom search.
Simplymarry is a matrimony site that belongs to the Times Group (Times of India Newspaper). They claim to have millions of profiles in their database and there is not much of a difference between them and other popular matrimonial sites in India. They also offer community and religion-based search feature.
SimplyMarry is advertised as a zero subscription matrimony service. However, they have also indicated in one of their pages about various membership options! We are still not sure about the “free” spiel. Our minions will be investigating this further. Stay tuned.
According to Alexa, SimplyMarry is ranked 980 among all Indian websites.
User review for SimplyMarry
Here is a review from Mouthshut.com
They should work more on service part. Because, all people will like to feel special and if anyone don’t give importance, then they will never forgive. So, I advise them to work more on service part. And moreover, they should focus on people’s profile and all profile should be genuine and perfect. But, one big advantage is that they also provide free message services. here, you can exchange your contact details for FREE!
All other reviews were negative! We have also not come across anyone using this site from own primary research in Chennai.
4. Bharat Matrimony
Bharat Matrimony is close competitor of Shaadi. They claim to have millions of verified members in their database. Along with Shaadi, Bharatmatrimony is a pioneer in the online matrimony business and have branched out to offer online matrimony in over a dozen languages for various states and communities in India. They also offer other services like personalized or assisted matrimony and matrimony services for elite (in other words, rich) users.
Their pricing information is as seen in the screen below. Their monthly pricing ranges from Rs.800 to Rs.1500 per month and will vary depending on the package and the duration.
BharatMatrimony is ranked 1221 by Alexa in terms of popularity in India. However, we estimate their traffic to be higher as they have multiple religion / community-based portals such as tamilmatrimony.com.
User reviews for Bharat Matrimony
Here is a review by an NRI user in the US as published in New York Times.
Kadhambari Sridhar, 26, from Falls Church, Va., endured seven unsuccessful exchanges on TamilMatrimony. She said she met men who were “coerced” by their parents and were “not ready for marriage.” Some men even stood her up on dates. Kadambari found a match on Tinder!
Here is a review from Mouthshut.com
My marriage was an arranged one. My mother posted my profile without taking paid membership at first. She had to go through a lot of unnecessary profiles. She went to Kerala Matrimony’s office in Thiruvananthapuram and paid the money and became a paid member and there on she got legit profiles and got information of whoever contacted her. She found a groom for me by talking to them over the phone and rest like any other arranged marriage. The family we found were like ours and we are happy. Today I’m happily married.
This is a site run by the Malayala Manorama Group in Kerela. They also claim to be the largest matrimony site in Kerala. Because they are backed by a publishing group, they provide additional services like print ads.
They have a big list of subscription options for various prices. You will get a headache when you look at their pricing chat! Here is a screen that provides all the gory details. We recommend you spend a leisurely Sunday afternoon evaluating the various pricing options. If only they had provided a monthly cost for the various options!
According to Alexa, they are ranked 5123 in India.
User reviews for M4marry
We could not find any reviews for their website. However, we did find some reviews for their Android app. We will update this post if we manage to unearth user reviews for their website.
new layout – really bad. the updated layout is good but functionality lacks convenient app browsing. takes longer to load pages. lag in app performance. Pls include app notification feature too. Would be very helpful for all. Also, please enable a feature to be signed in once app is installed. Signing in every time is a menace.
From Good To Bad To Worse!!! The app development team blindly release any updates, without doing the adequate trial and error and conducting rectifications. You are nothing less than the “KINDERGARTEN kids” who are just impatient to show the new toy to others!!!!! I would rather stick to the m4marry website than this useless app. Goodbye!
This is a regional site based out of Chennai and caters to the local Brahmin community. We decided to profile this site even though the size of their database is limited (as they cater to a niche audience in a local market). The reason for including them is because of the fact that they have a strong presence in the local market and their founder is very active in galvanizing the community for matchmaking purposes.
There are no freebies here. You got to pay to create your profile. Here is a table or prices. They offer discounted pricing for disabled users.
Their Alexa ranking is 50062 among websites in India.
This is not a matrimony site! They are an aggregator. Here is how Bandhan works. You sign up in any of the matrimony sites (Shadi, Jeevansathi, SimplyMarry, BharatMatrimony) and then share the profile ID with Bandhan. Your profile is now a part of their database. Now anyone searching for profiles through Bandhan can find you. In simple words, Bandhan brings together all the profiles from all the leading matrimony sites. That’s neat! To top it all, it’s a free service.
Their Alexa ranking is 6423 among Indian websites.
Hope you will find this post useful. Like and share this post. Send in your comments as well.
Found someone through a matrimony site?
Share your Jodi Logik biodata to create a great impression.
Read these articles on matrimonial sites in India
Posted in Arranged Marriage, Marriage, Matchmaking, Matrimony Sites
Tagged with: Arranged Marriage, India, Matchmaking, Matrimony Sites
Arranged marriages are the norm in India. As most of you might have realized after watching the Bollywood movie ‘2 States’ (and even before that), marriage in India is an alliance between two families rather than a bond of love between two people.
We have come a long way when it comes to matchmaking. Our grandparents or even some of our parents had to deal with marrying someone without even seeing them once before marriage! Looking back at the old customs and rituals that were followed during matchmaking might seem outrageous, or even unbelievable, but you can’t deny that we have had some crazy matchmaking practices in our country. We bring to you the best of these weird and funny matchmaking practices. Some of us might be glad we don’t live in the era when such practices were the norm.
1. Dowry continues to be a part of matchmaking
"India - Delhi wedding - 5438" by © Jorge Royan / http://www.royan.com.ar. Licensed under CC BY-SA 3.0 via Commons - https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:India_-_Delhi_wedding_-_5438.jpg#/media/File:India_-_Delhi_wedding_-_5438.jpg
It is one of the oldest and most abused practices when it comes to matchmaking. The history of dowry is not clear, but it is believed to have started so that daughters could have equal rights in the inheritance of her family’s wealth. Boy oh boy, have we abused this tradition or what! It is sickening to see how crimes against women have escalated in the name of dowry. In some parts of India, women were sold to men in the name of dowry. We sure as hell are glad that dowry is a crime in India, but a lot more needs to be done to get the message to millions of Indians who still think demanding dowry is their birthright.
If you were wondering whether Dowry is just a practice in India, we have 10 Craziest Dowry Stories from around the world for you. Share your dowry stories in the comments section.
2. Marry an animal first
Across the board, women have never had it easy in India when it comes to marriages and matchmaking. In some parts of India, it is believed that girls who are born with facial deformation are possessed by ghosts. And the only way to get rid of the ghost is for the girl to marry an animal, typically a goat or dog. God, we are a sad country for women to be born in, aren’t we?
3. Child marriage
Much has been said and written about child marriage but we just wanted to remind you of it. Imagine if matchmaking for you started when you were just 12 years old. What if instead of fighting with your parents over buying you an expensive phone, you had to fight over which person you will get married to? Child marriage, thankfully, is illegal now but like dowry, is still practiced in several parts of this great nation! Here is a UN report on the practice of child marriages and the social and economic reasons thats driving this practice.
4. Leaving it to a fowl
Among the Angamis (a tribe in Nagaland), a young man having chosen his potential mate, tells his father, who then sends a friend to determine the wishes of the girl’s parents. If they express conditional approval, the bridegroom’s father tests the proposal by strangling a fowl (a hen or chicken) and watching the way in which it crosses its legs when dying. If the legs are placed in an inauspicious manner, the match is immediately ended. Otherwise, the girl is informed of the favorable progress of negotiations. At this stage, she can veto the whole relationship if she has an inauspicious dream in the next three days. If nothing of that sort happens, the wedding day is fixed.
What we like in this bizarre matchmaking process is that the girl can fake an inauspicious dream and end the nonsense once and for all!
5. Men’s beauty pageant
"1997 274-24 Gerewol" by Dan Lundberg - 1997 #274-24 Gerewol. Licensed under CC BY-SA 2.0 via Commons - https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:1997_274-24_Gerewol.jpg#/media/File:1997_274-24_Gerewol.jpg"
In this matchmaking practice followed by African tribe of Wodaabe, men are supposed to impress women! And it is not just about dressing up and looking good. Men of this tribe are often found spending their days grooming to look attractive and be spotted by women. They also have annual matchmaking festival called, “Gerewol” where men dress up and participate in a dancing competition called the “Yaake” to impress women. What do you say about a little role reversal, eh?
And as a signoff, we present to you the one matchmaking process that you will die for:
The best matchmaking practice in the world?
In ancient Egypt, courting was incredibly simple. If a man liked a woman, and she liked him back, they would move into the same house and live together. That’s it. Then they were married.
Oh, how we all wished life would be such simple, right?
If you know about some weird / funny / strange matchmaking practices, do let us know in the comments section below.
Use Jodi Logik to bypass all these crazy matchmaking practices to find your special someone. Give it a try!
Other awesome posts
Posted in Arranged Marriage, Matchmaking
Tagged with: Arranged Marriage, Child Marriage, Dowry, Matchmaking